Now, not being from the UK, my main exposure to the phenomenon of the Christmas #1 is through the Christmas iTunes playlist compiled by Mrs I Heart Guitar a few years ago. And while I take great glee in pointing out the irony of thousands of people buying a song that includes the words ‘Fuck you, I won’t do what you tell me’ because someone told them too, I take even greater glee in the hope that this win will clear the decks and reset the Christmas #1 tradition to once again be awarded to cheesy Christmas songs by established artists who really should know better, like it was in the mid to late 80s. Observe these particular 80s chart toppers:
1984: Band Aid Do They Know It’s Christmas?
1985: Shakin’ Stevens Merry Christmas Everyone
1988: Cliff Richard Mistletoe and Wine
1989: Band Aid II Do They Know It’s Christmas?
1990: Cliff Richard Saviour’s Day
By the way, it’s not just number one songs that make Christmas in the UK rule. Check out these gems.
But what if this doesn’t reset the great Christmas #1 equilibrium? What if every year becomes a race to the top between the most recent X Factor winner and some other 90s hit? Could we see next year’s winner going up against Mr.Big’s To Be With You? Ministry’s Just One Fix? Primus’s Mr Krinkle? Or could you imagine waking up bleary-eyed on Christmas morning and flipping on the telly to see this?
No, wait, y’know what? I think 2010 should be the year The Christmas Song by Steve Lukather reaches number 1.